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  • Pedants corner again . .

    stockwellpete

    By stockwellpete

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    I started this thread a few weeks ago in the wrong forum. 

    Basically, I am playing the game quite a lot at the moment as I am retired now, and I have noticed quite a few examples where the text in the game might be improved. I am not saying the existing text is wrong, or anything bumptious like that, just that "plain English" might be helpful in a few places.

    I'll give some examples in this post.

    First example . . .
    During a match when an offside decision is given the text says, "That looked very close to being onside." Well, quite. Offside decisions are often very close. Maybe the text would be better if it just said, "That was a tight call!"

    Second example . . .

    In a match report opponents were described as "goal-friendly". This is a bit awkward and unusual. How about "high-scoring" or "free-scoring"?

    Third example . . .

    A journalist asks a manager about the match and he/she replies, "I would rather focus on the game itself than endlessly discuss it." I mean to say! It's a press conference called to discuss the match and the reply is totally contradictory.

    Fourth example (and one of the worst ones) .

    Again from a press conferences where proceedings seem to be taking a very mystical turn. The reporter asks, "Your team looks well on course to realise long-term objectives set out some time ago?" First of all, How does the journalist know what my long-term objectives are? Beyond avoiding relegation in my first season with my club playing at a higher level. And the mystical reply you can give is, "It is close enough that we can taste it. We've worked hard for it and we just have to see it through now." What is this mysterious "it" - and what might it taste like? Seeing as we are 10 games into the season and we are top of the table. What is he even going on about? lol I think this just needs to be removed.

    Fifth and final example for this post . . .

    In pre-match reports you can read . . . "So and so team go into this away game with every chance of walking away with something (some cutlery, perhaps?) against slight favourites so and so team", according to 90mins.com. This is extremely convoluted. Instead, something simpler like, "So and so team visit so and so team hopeful of taking something from the match.

    There are lots more that I can report in due course.

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    stockwellpete
    16 minutes ago, Zachary Whyte said:

    Thank you for the detailed feedback, we will take your suggestions under consideration for future releases. :)  

    Ok thanks. I think the issue is that some of these screens will appear many times in the course of a season and the more ungainly phrases start to stand out and irritate pedants like myself. lol

     

    A couple more for you from match commentaries. Players are sometimes described as "using their head to clear a ball", which makes the players' head sound like some sort of implement that he was carrying about with him. Just use "headed away by . . ." instead. And then you get situations where a player has gone on a superb, mazy run but then lashes the shot way over the bar. The commentary will say "Great play until the finish", or something similar. Just say great effort by so-and-so, exclamation mark". Just keep it short and snappy.

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    stockwellpete

    Top pedantry for this one . . .

    In the " Monthly Board Performance Review" when you get an "A" "Untouchable" rating it says . . .

    "To summarise, the board feel you are doing an unbelievable job and you are clearly the right manager for the job."

    Nothing wrong except you have used the word "job" twice in the same sentence. Better is . . . 

    "To summarise, the board feel you are doing an unbelievable job and you are clearly the right manager for our club."

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