[FM23] Nessie Awakes!

[phnompenhandy]

We had five days to reflect and regroup before a crucial home tie with table-topping Mosset Tavern. It was enough for everyone to rest although some such as Spence and Barclay were struggling to gain positivity. I concluded that Bannigan and Carmichael had been weak links on the flanks and felt they’d benefit from time in the reserves squad – where, incidentally my surplus of forwards – Salinas, Berton and Valentine were retraining as midfielders – I explained that if they could adapt by the end of the season, they’d get new contracts. That meant Wright and Anderson would get extended runs at full back. The other major change was to give a chance to crazy Ruari to establish himself up top with Willie McGlynn being allowed to relax, as it were, on the bench. The rest of the bench would be made up of lads lacking first team experience but who deserved a chance through impressing in training and reserve games – McIntyre, Fergus, Wardrope, McBay and Muir.

The changes didn’t go altogether smoothly with only Leiper rising to the task with a brace, aided as always by Severin who chipped in with a stoppage time free kick in a match that ended 3-3. We were lucky to take that point, as we were clearly second-best throughout. Hopefully, we’re heading into a run of less taxing games to help bed in my adjustments. The full back positions are still giving me major grief, however.

 

Mosset Tavern - we don't come here until December though

 

After a couple of days to rest and recuperate, the next match was thankfully at home, with Kyleakin travelling up from Skye. Them and our next opponents, Tain Thistle and Shetland, were relative minnows, the kinds of opponent we needed to beat to restore our flagging morale. Everyone other than Severin and Leiper were starting to look really low. I mean, they’re kids – being quasi bipolar is part of the package.

Events unfolded pretty much as I’d hoped. We found our mojo against Kyleakin, being unlucky not to score more than two goals. We then proceeded to throw away that progress with a 0-1 defeat at Tain. We didn’t play well, but we were far better than the opposition.

 

However, we did enjoy a post-match dinner in the lovely old royal burgh of Tain

 

A quick turnaround before a much-needed breather, we travelled up to Thurso to face Shetland. I dropped Leiper ad restored McGlynn as a pressing forward for this game. McGlynn did score in a 2-2 draw, a fair result for another underwhelming performance. September ended with us lying in 7^th place, but the teams above us were also pretty inconsistent, and with a run through October of strugglers, I felt optimistic that our fortunes were about to improve. We have to - the boss called me in for a wee chat that I don't wish to share.

 

State of play at close of September

Edited December 3, 2022 by phnompenhandy

[phnompenhandy]

2 hours ago, GIMN said:

Ruari Leiper is a phenomenal name - I wonder if there's an element of nominative determinism in having a 5'8" player called leaper!  Also, completely unrelated to this save, I recently tried to convince work that I should be allowed to move to Thurso and just travel down for 1 week per month (as opposed to 1 day a week).  Sadly it fell on deaf ears.

Magic! Why did you want to be based in Thurso?

[phnompenhandy]

We had a week’s rest and a chance to go over our tactics on the training ground. It was there that I realised that I’d been causing problems by playing some players in the wrong roles, especially the wingbacks who were actually pretty decent as wingers. So we tweaked again, this time settling on more of a 4-3-3 with inside forwards on both flanks. The forward who fitted into the system best on the training ground hadn’t played a senior game yet – our Scottish saffer Jermaine Zungu, doing his best to get me attention by copying Ruari’s Mohican. I believe they’re convinced it makes them taller.

With this new set-up we set off to play Plockton, from officially the most beautiful village in the world – and home of Hamish MacBeth.

Plockton. We didn't come here

Except we didn’t travel that far as they’re based at Ferry Brae in Inverness for their home games.

 

On the day of the match, Zungu got the collywobbles. I was going to turn to our Scottish-Filipino Juan Salinas but he felt nervous too, so I fell back on McGlynn. It turned out to be an inadvertent good result, with McGlynn in his familiar pressing forward role, Severin and scoring debutant Josh Muir flanked him and combined to win us the match 3-1. Anderson got himself sent off and earned a three-match ban in what was overall a disjointed performance, but I saw enough to feel we should persist with this tactic until we become fully familiar with it.

We had a further week’s break to prepare the tactics better before another run of two-games-a-week intensity. However, in the match at home to Maryburgh, after taking an early lead and dominating the first hour, we visibly flaked later on and conceded a late equaliser to end 1-1. It’s going to take these young lads months to build up sufficient stamina – I’ve got Sara, Morgan and Muir backing me up here; I trust Shane Carling understands that.

 

Tiny Staxigoe. We didn't play here either

Our re-arranged match at Staxigoe was fast up next – we dragged our weary legs to Thurso.

Barclay was too exhausted to travel so Wardrope got his debut – and was awful. Jimmy Duffty filling in for Anderson at right back was no better. Young Juan, however, playing in place of knackered McGlynn did play well and scored. Ultimately we salvaged a poor game with a late penalty by Callaghan to ‘earn’ a 3-3 draw. I think for the next game or two I’m going to have to put out a near-fully second-string side to allow these poor lads to recover.

This is our current tactic, by the way -

 

Edited December 5, 2022 by phnompenhandy

[phnompenhandy]

And I did. In my defence, I put out the only eleven boys left standing, and we had two home ties in a week against two of the most abject sides in the league.  So yes, it was awkward to be stuffed by Wick Groats 2-4 in an absolutely terrible display in front of our own impatient fans. At least Merkinch, rank bottom of a very high pyramid, had the decency to lose, albeit in a very tight game. The result was 4-3 with Zunga finally starting and celebrating with a brace. It was the return of Severin after being rested that swung the game. Despite that, given the quality of the opposition, there was little to cheer. Due to every club getting a nosebleed when they get near the summit, we’re still remarkably in 4^th spot.

 

Do the Zunga (Leiper's twin brother?)

 

 

[phnompenhandy]

We were away to John O’Groats next. Although they play in Thurso, they always have some supporters who rock up for the craic and Instagram moment. Again, I brought a makeshift squad with me and again, we were poor. We undeservedly came away with a point when McGlynn came of the bench late on and equalised to make it 1-1. The boss is not amused. Never mind that we’re a point off automatic promotion – he’s demanding wins in our next two. They are against two of the most useless teams in the league to be fair, but we’ve been here before, haven’t we?

John O'Groats.  Not here too

 

It's a mixed bag. Unfortunately, our chairman isn't an M&Ms type

 

Edited December 3, 2022 by phnompenhandy

[phnompenhandy]

Despite the pressure I was under, I still couldn’t put out a first-choice side at Dingwall to meet the Gairloch & Aultbea side. It would have been child-abuse to do otherwise. The 4-3 result was more comfortable than it looks, with Severin and McGlynn combining well once more. The defence was shocking, however. That needs attention. one down.

They come to Dingwall. We don't go there. I mean, it's a beautiful place, and Gruinard Island just off the coast is claimed to be clean 50 years after the government conducted a biological warfare experiment by soaking it in anthrax, but .... yeh.

 

Two days later, Jacko's was up from Nairn. Gelling was perceived. I saw joy on the faces of fans. And then we flagged after the hour mark and finished up with yet another 1-1 draw. I'm not out of the woods.

 

Not yet - it was a home tie

 

As November rolled around, I was faced with a likely job-saving scenario. We now move into a schedule of one game a week for the rest of the season (weather allowing). Boy, do we need that!

Edited December 3, 2022 by phnompenhandy

[phnompenhandy]

It was an awful start. We went up to Lairg who were in 2^nd and on a strong run. The mood of the boys was so low, and we were shockingly bad. 0-3 was us getting off lightly. I gave Callum Marr his first start in goal. It might be his last. Wardrope got a rare chance and took it by getting himself sent off. He’s been sent to the wee hoos.

The Wee Hoos

Fun fact to lighten the mood. I was there a little while ago, taking a highland break while my wife was off on a business trip to Seoul. I called her to inform her I'd found the perfect wee house on an island in a loch, and we should buy it as our retirement home. I said I'd bring photos when I returned to Cambodia. She wasn't best amused. She lacks that Scottish flavour of humour.

 

Yeh, nobody laughed - not the boys, not the boss. Everyone's in a deeply sullen mood. It was our heaviest defeat in the league, but we're still in a play-off spot, for heaven's sake. Back to the training ground - what else can I do?

We simply have no viable full backs or wingbacks. Do I need to revert to that 3 at the back formation? But that necessitates wingbacks and that wasn't working. I pleaded with Muir, “Bring me full backs in the next academy intake!” He couldn’t promise anything – too early to say. See, what I dare not say to Shane is that promotion this season would be a disaster. How would we cope with this squad in a league full of semi-pro teams? No doubt he'd tell me we'd turn semi-pro too - but how would that benefit us when we don't have the players? What we need as a priority is school-leavers going straight into the first team to strengthen it, especially at full back. In the meantime, we’re making money, earning £783 for each victory and half that for a draw – given we don’t lose many, each week is profitable. Until we get the players we need, bumbling around with fellow amateurs is probably the safest move. But this is football - at the end of the day we have to try to win every game and see where fate takes us.

If there’s a positive note, it’s that more and more of the lads are putting in a shift on the training ground, now we have midweeks to do that. At some point that’s got to pay off, right. There was a sole exception, Tom McIntyre who really stank up the lace with his attitude so for the sake of the collective, I kicked him out.

Edited December 4, 2022 by phnompenhandy

[phnompenhandy]

Our next opponents were fresh off a morale-boosting demolition of Mosset Tavern and we knew we’d be up against it as Kyle of Lochalshe hosted us at Inverness. In an all-round poor performance, Severin and McGlynn rose above to dross to deliver a 3-2 victory with a late Willie McGlynn winner. Would that mark the start of something?

Possibly, is the answer. The following Saturday in front of our glum and rebellious fans, we smashed Uncle Bob’s 5-0, who were sitting above us in the table. All five goals resulted from kamikaze defending, but sometimes those are the breaks. It was our best result of the season, with a remarkable four goals from Willie who has now bagged 15 goals in 15 starts. The mood has changed – within the camp and outwith. Oh yes.

That win put us in fine fettle as we prepared for the KGV derby, nominally at ‘home’ to Fortrose and Rosemarkie Union. Anything other than victory would be unacceptable to the chairman and fans alike, but at least the pressure was off as we put in the hard yards on the ‘training pitch’.

Our superstars Severin and McGlynn were a bit under the weather and had to sit the game out. This time, the defence rose to the occasion and shut the opposition out as we cruised to a 3-0 win.

We as close out November and the highland winter starts to decimate the fixture schedule, we come to the half-way point of the season.  We have played each team in our league once and are up to third, one spot off automatic promotion with this current run. The board and fans are still dissatisfied with me, but I think that’s a bit unfair.

 

For me, the big picture is this: it’s taken half a season for these young kids to get into their stride. With a killer two-games-week schedule for this first half of the season, it was hard for the boys, and it was hard for me to settle on a tactic with so little time on the training ground. This month, November, we were finally able to get together for midweek training sessions and the results have been remarkable. I can see real progress being made. Especially now the rotten apple has been disposed of, most of the  lads are making real and rapid progress, with what they’re learning in training being translated to the pitch. I’m positive – I think the second half of the season will be far more successful that the first, and I think we’ll meet the board’s and fans; objectives. And therein lies the rub – it’s ironic I know, but I still maintain that way ahead lies disaster. It’s a funny old game.

Edited December 4, 2022 by phnompenhandy

[phnompenhandy]

December and the second half of the season started with a home game against divisional giants, semi-pro Thurso, who’ve not been having a great first half of the season themselves. In a repeat of our opening fixture, we drew 2-2 thanks to McGlynn salvaging a late equaliser. Our right back Achilles heel was exposed again as a suspended Anderson meant that Jimmy Duffty had to fill in and he wasn’t familiar with the requirements. Andy Carmichael picked up a twisted ankle that Morgan reckons will keep him out for six weeks.

Muir managed to combine a school trip to France with completing a fancy-dan Continental coaching licence (he has been working on it since before I arrived). That wasn’t the reason I kissed and hugged him on seeing him again; this was:

 

The news could not be better – everything I could have asked for. Even the absence of strikers is good as we have a surfeit in that position anyway and I don’t want to release any.

Given the players I have who I don't think will ever make the grade, this is my provisional wish-list: 2 leftbacks and 2 right backs (a full clear-out), 2 midfielders (back up for Culbert and Neilson), and a left and right winger. A centre back or two who are quick would be nice but not essential.

We took ourselves down to the Culduthel Park at Inverness, the Royal Academy ground that hosts numerous clubs including Avoch, and returned with a 3-0 victory in the most pleasing display I’d seen in months. That put us in 4^th place ahead of a challenging run of fixtures.

 

We had a very nice afternoon at Avoch after the match.

Shane and Muir stayed behind - they were having a tour of the Royal Academy and discussing ideas to base some of our juniors coaching at their facilities. Numerous clubs in our league have been in discussions with the Royal Academies here and in Dingwall, but we're the dedicated youth-only club in the league, which appeals very strongly to the school.

http://www.invernessroyalacademy.org.uk/s2-s3-football/

The next day, after multiple refusals to improve anything despite the board’s avowed objective, after positive discussions in Inverness, Shane finally had a change of heart (well, he saw a way to progress without dipping into our kitty - see below). Hopefully, this will help Muir deliver even more quality in the Spring. As he reminds me, “No guarantees, though”. They think we can persuade some of the better Fortrose boys to join us if they can split their Highers between Fortrose Academy and the Royal Academy, using the coaching staff and facilities at Inverness, and in the longer term, have boys from the age of 12 up join regular coaching sessions at the Royal. Shane sees this as a cost-effective measure - hiring their superior facilities instead of the club investing in its own or waiting for Fortrose Academy to upgrade. Furthermore, he argues that it's within the remit of the objectives of our club if new academy recruits originate from the academy in Inverness in addition to Fortrose, significantly increasing the pool of kids we can draw on. Later Shane told me privately that this very much suits the Royal too as they want their graduates to be exposed to first team experience, and soon he'll start looking into relocating the club back to Inverness if he can find a bigger ground in the city at an affordable rent. He says that will be feasible if I can increase income and we don't need to invest it into spending on our own facility upgrades. It feels like it’s all coming together.

 

Table at close of 2022

Edited December 5, 2022 by phnompenhandy

[phnompenhandy]

Coming together, falling apart - what's the difference?

Josh Muir gave us a headache by picking up a booking and one-match suspension. With Carmichael out, we were left short of a left winger. Right winger Cian Duffty filled in for our home tie with Portree Juniors, a place and point behind us at the time. The kid struggled, and couldn’t get any service to McGlynn, so we closed out 2022 with a dreary 0-0 draw. It leaves us five points off where the fans want us to be. It seems bridgeable. Mind you, yellow cards and suspensions are falling like snow now, so we’ll be bodging line-ups together for a while.

With sufficient time to train and travel to Inverness, for Christmas, I managed to get my first coaching qualification, a National C, which was nice.

On New Years Day we went up to Wick to face Pentland United. Despite missing the suspended Callaghan, we played well with Barclay again imposing himself as a rock in defence and keeping the opposition at bay. We came away with a 2-0 win. Lairg Rovers and Mosset Tavern both dropped points to lowly opposition, taking us to within two points of the top.

The next weekend Staxigoe came to town. It was a match we were expected to win comfortably. Barclay was missing – it was his turn to be suspended – and I’d taken my eye off the ball with future dreaming. It was my fault, and the 0-2 reversal didn’t go down well with the fans. That game also resulted in a setback for Callaghan who got injured in return from suspension, and suspensions for Spence and Wright. It was bare-bones time again as Thorfinn rocked up. With five out due to knocks and suspensions, Rob Fergus gamely filled in at central defence again, and I simplified the instructions to the useless full backs, but they were hopeless. McGlynn compensated for our defensive disasterclass with two goals to salvage a 2-2 draw. Hopefully, we’d have our players back to face the other Kirkwall outfit, Hotspurs the following weekend.

With too many players off form, I made changes and the squad weren’t happy with my selections. They played with an air of scepticism too, turning their mood into a self-fulfilling prophecy. We lost 0-1 where, with McGlynn downing tools, we didn’t have a single shot on target. We travelled to the table-topping Tavern next and the atmosphere couldn’t be worse.

Mosset Tavern is past Nairn, near Broom of Moy and Boghole Farm – we crossed by small ferry to other side of Moray Firth thus cutting down on petrol costs. Their support is a curious mix of airmen from RAF Kinloss and hippies down from Findhorn. Makes for a colourful following. Willie was in his own personal boghole and I left him at home, starting Mad Ruari up top instead. Jack Cunningham has started succumbing to a series of injuries which makes me think that for his personal welfare, he should have an extended rest. If only we weren’t so dependent on him. With a perfect storm of injuries, suspensions, lack of form and a quiet rebellion brewing amongst the squad, my mood couldn’t have been much lower as I gave the teamtalk. We were awful. The game was awful. Yet somehow, we took the lead with a second half Salinas goal before conceding a last-minute equaliser in time added as the familiar fatigue set in. I’d stuck a protesting Salinas out on the left wing as Muir was too out of form and Carmichael wasn’t fit. To be honest, the outcome was better than I’d feared, even if Ross was the only one to share that sentiment. Elsewhere, other than Thurso who are making a charge up the table, our rivals all stumbled too. Don’t ask me about the league table though; I’m not even thinking about it. Everybody else is, but I’m shutting out the noise.

Chilly February blew in; the next weekend we played Kyleakin from Skye. Given that they play their games at the Royal Academy in Inverness, I wanted to put on a good show for the home fans from the school as well as get our boys a wee bit motivated. I got the squad in on Sunday morning and gave a heart-felt speech. I’m by no means a man-manager, Mr. Motivator Winston Churchill type, but what I said seemed to have the desired effect and the boys looked really positive. Training in midweek was far more pleasant too. For the most part. Wardrope and Stewart chose to give me lip and I decided to leave them behind, heavily implying they have no future at the club with attitudes like that. I’m considering terminating their contracts so they can join Tom McIntyre in hanging around the park wasting his life, but they both made a point by playing very well in the midweek reserves fixture, so I’ll hold off for now.

I think we did just enough to make a good impression on the Royal Academy staff and students although McGlynn is so off his game that we needed a last-minute own goal to warrant the 3 points in a 2-1 victory. It was our first win since New Year’s Day five matches ago. We have three home games against sides lying 17^th, 15^th and 14^th upcoming and a chance to placate our home support that hasn’t seen a win since November.

McGlynn’s suspension made matters easier for me as Salinas got the chance to stake a claim for the striker spot when Lewis & Harris paid a visit. He was poor and then sick. Sums up where we are at the moment. A dour 0-0 draw was the outcome. The midweek training session was a struggle and I made appoint by publicly terminating Gerry Stewart’s time with us – the lad has potential but it’s irrelevant when he puts in so little effort and pulls faces at the lads who do want to try. Ethan Wardrope got in a strop and threatened to leave if Stewart was released. He left.

Against Tain Thistle, more in desperation that by clear planning, I urged the boys to go out and attack from the outset. We were quite exciting in rare moments, but the final score of 1-0 only came via a penalty. Our forwards have all forgotten how to do their jobs.

We went with the same approach against Shetland except with Zunga on the striker carousel after a couple of decent performances in the reserves. That worked (in that he scored with his only shot). He combined well with Severin to race into a 3-0 lead before we threw away a couple of late goals. Still, the 3-2 victory meant we went undefeated through February, much against appearances.

Five games undefeated, yet such poor form. Roll on Academy Intake Day.

[phnompenhandy]

My attempts to turn Berton and Valentine into midfielders have failed, I have to admit. I’ve apologised to them and we’ve agreed that they won’t get into the first team, so we agreed together that they should move on.

March opened with a close-fought 0-0 draw with Maryburgh at Culduthel Park, the royal Academy ground. That was followed by an awkward home defeat 1-2 to Plockton. We were the better team and played alright, but two howlers by Spence gifted them the points. Shane’s adamant the loss has cost us any chance of automatic promotion, our agreed target. The home support had already expressed such sentiments rather more tersely. There’s nothing I can say to that.

Willie McGlynn’s not helping my mood. He’s complaining about being dropped and doesn’t accept that his form has been atrocious. Like it or not, he plays in the reserves until he rediscovers his mojo.

Leiper was our striker de jour as we faced Wick Groats. He nabbed two, we played well in a 3-0 win. Admittedly Groats were utterly undone by an early red card. We went with the same team apart from playing our right back, Anderson, on the left and Leiper bagged a hat-trick in a 4-1 demolition without any generosity from John O’Groats. Are we back?

 

Shane in talks with two Loch Ness senior teenagers – Jacob Kerr and Luke Seago about joining us next season.

Ross Tokely is an Inverness Caley legend and insists the club has just about the best youth academy in Scottish football. Shane agrees and is observing it closely with a view to eventually emulate it. I don’t ask how viable it is to have two nationally prestigious academies in the same remote city. But I am intrigued to know they a have already enquired into developing some kind of affiliate relationship. Clachnacuddin already have one but Shane’s looking at one of a different nature. The club has indicated it might look favourably on the proposal if we were part-time and playing at a higher level. “Something for the future” stated Shane, not clarifying if that future includes me.

 

Strike while the iron's hot

 

[phnompenhandy]

What we've been waiting for. The day before April Fool's Day Muir brought his class of '23 to meet us and have a kick-around. My early impression is we have four - maybe five speedy wingers and a couple of tidy midfielders. There's a back four who look rather ordinary, which will require us to keep on a couple of defenders we  might otherwise have let go - but overall I'm very pleased indeed.

 

[phnompenhandy]

Back in the league, Ruari is on a roll. Another brace brought us a tidy 2-0 win at Bught Park in Inverness against Merkinch. Perhaps the most pleasing aspect was seeing our full backs put in a shift like I’ve not seen before. I did have the first team squad watch the rest of the squad play our academy lads – who won 3-2 the day before. Seems it served as a reality check for some of our shirkers. It’s not over, you know. We’ve won three on the trot and there are six to go.

We finally made it to Jacko’s in Nairn where our hosts invited us to a fine pub lunch before the match. Two of the new kids made it into the starting squad – Jason Kelly looks a really skilful inverted left winger and Jay Cook is a midfield backup to Culbert and Neilson, but I thought to try him as a defensive midfielder initially. Would you believe it? The two juvenile debutants scored in assured performances to give us a 2-1 win. Thurso and Portree Juniors are on winning streaks above us, but if one of them stumbles …

Yeah, we enjoyed a delicious meal before the match

 

We stumbled. I gave McFylnn a chance to prove himself and he let us down again. Kelly scored again and Cook was our best player but we only drew 1-1 with lowly Gairloch. With any sense of complacency scrubbed away, we spent the week preparing thoroughly for the visit of Lairg Rovers, sat in third spot, above us by dint of one goal better, both of us on the tails of Thurso and Portree. I moved Cook to central midfield and gave debuts to two fullbacks on the basis that they couldn’t be worse than the incumbents. The right back, Chrissy Harrold, got overexcited and nabbed a red card, but Kelly scored and Callaghan won the latch 4-2 with two penalties in the last ten minutes. With Portee losing the night before, we found ourselves second, in an automatic promotion spot.

 

Line up and tactics for April

 

Edited December 5, 2022 by phnompenhandy

[phnompenhandy]

I released Lamb and Salinas once all the graduates I wanted had signed amateur forms (12 out of 16 trialists – we had too many right wingers and I didn’t need a goalkeeper). We now have a squad of 36. Ross Tokely has been joined by an ex-team mate from Caley Thistle’s glory days in the guise of bobby Mann, our new Under 18s assistant manager.

 

We closed off April with a trip to Nairn to play against the leery regulars of Uncle Bob’s. In a truly astonishing match with both sides giving all they’d got, we sealed a 5-4 victory with the last kick of the game. Our hosts very graciously allowed us to celebrate back at their place, with Thurso guaranteeing promotion, the thought began to sink in – this could actually be it!

 

Edited December 5, 2022 by phnompenhandy

[phnompenhandy]

Our clear stalwarts of the season who pulled us up to where we were in contention – McGlynn, Severin and Culbert are busted flushes. Thank goodness the new kids on the block arrived in the nick of time. Their freshness and talent have put us in an astonishing end of season run. Just two more games and we’re done.

Harrold served his suspension, and rather than start at right back again, I paired him with Barclay in the centre, a pair of giant nutting away all crosses. It was the Fortrose derby – emotions ran high. Our intake were all still at school with three of the opposition. In foul weather we pulverised our neighbours and eased to a 3-1 win. A draw in our final game at home to Kyle of Lochalshe would see us promoted behind champions Thurso. We won 3-2. Should have been a wider margin but there was a bit of nervousness at the back. No matter – what a finish to the season!

[phnompenhandy]

As others gear up for play-offs, we can take our time to review our season.

 

Having assessed in-game performances with effort on the training ground, my summary is as follows;

Goalkeeper - Eadie as consistent first-choice keeper has progressed nicely, and his place is secure.

Centre backs - Barclay has had an outstanding season, and Spence has been mostly solid alongside him.

Fullbacks - mostly a disaster, partly due to my constant tinkering trying to find a system that works, and partly due to not having anyone good enough. Anderson did pull his finger out towards the end of the season, but it remains to be seen whether he and Wright can step up to a higher level. In their favour, none of the new intake look any better.

Defensive Midfielder - Callaghan was generally adequate. Much of his good rating is down to being our penalty taker.

Central Midfield - Culbert began as our best player, but gradually faded. Neilson went the other way, starting on the bench and gradually rendering himself indispensable as he just got stronger and stronger.

Attack - Severin and McGlynn were phenomenal for most of the season - which was just as well, as none of our other attackers could find any consistency. Late on, the form of both completely disappeared. Have they peaked, or will they be fresh when the new season starts?

Whilst not having ready replacements for our fullbacks, our weakness on the left wing is solved by the exciting arrival of Kelly. Cook looks first-team ready too, and Szemeredi and Ashcroft might suffice as bench options. Harrold showed signs of being tall in central defence - he won't get any shorter, that's for sure, but he might need to fill in at right back. That’s about 15 players for a first team squad of 18.

Edited December 6, 2022 by phnompenhandy

[phnompenhandy]

The board - they haven't offered me a contract or anything, yet they're throwing these expectations at me:

 

 

I needed to discuss these playing styles with Shane. I pointed out that (1) we don't have a 'solid defence'; (2) I'd worked very hard to nurture a very successful neat passing style that was possession-driven and it has worked extremely well, and that (3) we didn't play counter-attacking as we lacked pace.

 

He accepted my first point and withdrew that requirement. But regarding the other two points, he stated that some of our new boys are quick, and we need to make use of that, and that at a higher level, he doesn't think our tippy-tappy approach would be wise.

He went on to inform me that we'll be turning semi-professional in July and that I need to persuade the key players to stay and be patient while he organises contracts. He also horrified me when he informed me the British FA had been in touch to let him know their reorganisation of the league means that we are being promoted from by far the weakest tenth tier level to by far the strongest ninth tier level - England. They want us to 'mix it' with the English teams, rather than stay in the comfort of the regional Scottish system or settle easily into a Welsh or Irish-based league. We are cast-iron certainties for relegation, explained Shane. However, the money is double for any points that we can wrestle, and his target is that I make us remain profitable while he builds up the infrastructure. Finally, he assured me, those talks with Seago and Race are going well - they at least are up for proving themselves against the English.

Edited December 6, 2022 by phnompenhandy

[phnompenhandy]

As Lairg surprisingly beat Portree Juniors to claim the third promotion spot, let's go around Britain to see what else happened, focussing on how far the Scottish clubs held their own against our colonial masters.

 

Tier 1       Manchester City are national champions. Both Celtic and Rangers managed to avoid relegation, finishing 19th and 20th respectively.

Tier 2       Dundee United had a great season, finishing 10th. Aberdeen escaped relegation by the skin of their teeth, ending in 21st place, leaving Hibs and Hearts to suffer relegation along with Welsh team Cardiff City.

Tier 3       Livingstone made the play-offs in 5th spot. The other Scottish sides finished either midtable or uncomfortably close to the relegation zone apart from Dundee and Dunfermline, who fell through the trap door.

Tier 4       Although Arbroath ended in 5th and three Irish sides - Shamrock Rovers, Linfield and Glentoran did okay, the three relegated teams were all Scottish - Airdrie, Falkirk and Queen of the South.

Tier 5      The six Scottish and Irish teams stayed in this league

Tier 6      Derry City lost in the play-off final in a league where Irish clubs performed well. Of the four Scottish sides, three were relegated.

Tier 7      In the first regional split into two leagues, the north division comprised Scottish and Irish sides. FC Edinburgh were champions, and Waterford edged out Kelty for the second promotion spot. Three of the four relegations were Scottish.

Tier 8    In the lower regional divisions, TNS and Bala were promoted from Wales, University College Dublin and Treaty from Ireland, Maidenhead and Gateshead from England and Brechin and Darvel from Scotland. In each of the four divisions, six teams are relegated to the smaller regional tiers.

Tier 9     In this tier there two regional leagues for each of the four nations. We'll just look at the league we'll be in next season. Ex-league side Scarborough won the title. Teams we'll meet include northern sides like Gainsborough, Whitby and FC United, and southern sides like Worthing, Bognor Regis and Margate, all on the south coast of England. The teams that got promoted from English tenth tier division 3B were Peterboro' Sports, Taunton and Ilkeston.

[Vakama2619]

Mind I ask where Scunthorpe finished this season?

[phnompenhandy]

6 minutes ago, Vakama2619 said:

Mind I ask where Scunthorpe finished this season?

Sorry, mate. They were in tier 5, the British National Championship One

 

[phnompenhandy]

Shane called me into to sign a contract. “There’s no salary”, he explained “As we’re an amateur club”. The next day he announced we were turning semi-pro and wages will be offered to staff and players. Eh? That better include me. My new contract has no clauses keeping me here on a mug’s job so I don’t know what point he was trying to make. I’ll wait.

A couple of weeks later, he called me in to declare he’d made his first paid staff appointment – Steven Doris, a very useful addition to our coaching department. Having introduced Doris, he added, almost as an afterthought, that he’d also appointed himself as technical director in a paid role. I fear I can see where this is going.

 

 

[phnompenhandy]

Over the summer Sara Habenicht, our head physio, was offered a paid job down at Portsmouth. She thankfully elected to stay with us – we’d never source such quality locally and I don’t believe Shane would even try (leaving Morgan as sole physio despite the squad size being 50% larger). Much as I’d love to pretend her decision was down to her loyalty to the kids and myself, in truth it was her beloved dolphins, with whom she’s developed very close relationships.

 

Er, ever had the feeling you've been had??? 

 

Edited December 7, 2022 by phnompenhandy

[phnompenhandy]

Just like last summer, I spent inordinate hours with Liam Crichton, our volunteer performance analyst who records and crunches the numbers. We poured over the performances of our older and new players to construct the optimum line-ups and tactics going forward. This is what we’ve come up with for pre-season.

 

 

We’re in the British English Prime Division 2B. One club, Buxton, have just sold a player for £15,750. They’re second-favourites for the title behind an ex-league club. There are eight Scottish sides. I can tentatively see us finishing above three of them. I informed Shane of my ambitions – he nodded, but was rather distracted by news that we’d be receiving north of £120,000 for TV rights over the season. Welcome to the big time (not sure I trust our supporters to back me though - what do they want from me??)!

Edited December 7, 2022 by phnompenhandy

[phnompenhandy]

Older viewers might remember the brinksmanship played out between Shane and me over a previous contract. He's not a flexible or reasonable man. Admittedly, last time, I was perhaps on the greedily unreasonable end of the scale, but this time I have justice on my side.  I've been working very hard, gratis, over the summer, and I've done my research. Other Scottish managers in our league:

Fellow amateur promotees Lairg Rovers have also gone semi-pro and haven't got round to a contract for their manager - although they do have a whopping £120,000 transfer budget, but Thurso pay theirs £1000 per month. The Ayrshire clubs expected to struggle pay theirs £1,700 (Troon), £2,500 (Bonnyton) and £875 (Kilwinning). The clubs from the Borders remunerate their managers to a monthly tune of £2,750 (Gala Fairydean) and £875 (Gretna). I didn't even inquire about the English clubs but since you're curious, ethical, anti-greed FC United's manager gets £2,900 per month along with his quarter of a million transfer budget. I daren't ask about the fully professional clubs - Boston United and Worthing and their £9-10,000 per month wage budgets. I'm expected to compete with all that? I'm not being unreasonable, Shane. I'm not. And my patience won't hold out forever.

 

As you can see, I've arranged a lot of friendlies for the pre-season that's about to start. Despite organising a provisional first team squad, I'm bringing all 36 squad players together for the friendlies, leaving U23 and U18 schedules to the side. The reason is that I'm going to engage in a considerable amount of tactical experimentation. There won't be any mercy if I don't minimise the weaknesses at full-back, and we do need to develop a more direct, counter-attacking strategy. We also need to perfect a more defensive strategy against the English clubs, while we know how to attack our Scots colleagues. We've got six weeks - until mid-August - to make sure we're all familiar and playing in a coherent manner.

Edited December 7, 2022 by phnompenhandy

[phnompenhandy]

Ahead of our friendly fixtures, let's just be aware of what we're up against this season. Here's how we compare with our league rivals by position:

 

[phnompenhandy]

...and by quality - you don't need to see the players' attributes to see how far we fall short

 

[phnompenhandy]

This is great - I think. Not sure exactly how we benefit, or at least how many years before we do, but I'm sure we will as it cost a lot of money.

 

 

Edited December 7, 2022 by phnompenhandy

[phnompenhandy]

Turns out I’m not being charged rent for my camp bed and I should know the cost of rental accommodation these days, and I’m allowed free use of the kettle and microwave. I get free access to the club laptop, and Shane also funds my coaching badges. I’m very grateful to him. To make ends meet, I now offer private tuition to some of the students at Fortrose Academy, so I’m sorted for porridge and biscuits.

I’d been having problems with Chris Wright on the training ground again. I bawled him out and nearly kicked him out of the club at the end of last season – trouble is, I couldn’t afford to do that as we were desperately short (ie absent) of cover at right back. By going a bit easy on him in front of the other lads, some of them were slacking off a bit. I was trying to hint to our Fitness Coach Kieran Spiers that he might step in and do a bit of man-management, but he wasn’t taking the hint and I didn’t want to look weak.

This is why I arranged so many friendlies in pre-season. The lads ain’t the quickest, and it’s been a monumental task to get through to their thick skulls what I need them to do. Only in the final week have they acquired a sense of tactical familiarity that sticks for a week at a time. I was expecting the throw the cup games, but we’re starting at home against our old rivals Thurso in the Regional Cup - we want to make a mark on them before the league season gets underway. Three days later we welcome Penybont from the Welsh league a tier above us where they finished 10^th last season. We knocked out Kettering last year – we’ll give it a go again.

Shane, Ross and I went down to Inverness for a routine meeting with the Royal Academy board as part of our ongoing discussions about how best to work together, and to take a look at their current final year students. The head coach drew our attention to a group of lads who had joined the academy after being rejected by Caley Thistle's academy. Shane felt it would be within our remit to take them in and proposed they join us for trials. The two most highly recommended boys were a striker and right back. I was excited. A couple of days later, they joined up with us, and we put them through their paces. Four of their pals came along to see them in a practice match and announced they'd been sent by the Royal to join too. Muir Morton confirmed it was no trick as Shane broke the news that his intention to bring Luke Seago and Josh Race from the first team had fallen through as they both secured full-time jobs outside football. Still, the unexpected bonus of six academy arrivals who were already looking more promising than most of our squad was more than I could have dreamed of (Shane noted that now I'd nearly finished assessing the returnees from last season, to incorporate the new lads, I'd need to release 8 or 9 who were not going to make it - they could be given the option of continuing their football education at the Royal - subject to the Royal's response to our references, Chris Wright!). So this would be our association with Inverness Royal Academy - they'd hoover up kids rejected by other Highland clubs and send the cream of them down to us. This could prove transformative.

 

Edited December 7, 2022 by phnompenhandy

[phnompenhandy]

With pre-season completed, let's have a look at how our staff assess the ability and potential of our tight squad going into the season:

 

[phnompenhandy]

Our season begins with an English Regional Cup home tie against Thurso. The competition is a pain in the neck in that the games are midweek and as we learnt last season, an already packed early season schedule is more than we can comfortably cope with – albeit we have a stronger (if smaller) squad this year. But it’s Thurso. We have set ourselves the target of beating Thurso, Lairg, Troon, Bonnyton and Kilwinning to stay up this season. Beating other sides is a bonus, but those are the teams I believe we can finish above.  We drew twice with Thurso as they beat us to the title last season – what a psychological boost it would supply to defeat them at the outset.

 

My revised expectations seem to be in line with the bookies. As far as they're concerned, we and Lairg have strengthened over the summer, while Thurso's And Bonnyton's squads appears to be weaker. We're expected to now finish not 23rd, but 21st. I think we can do better, but 21st would please the board and fans.

 

Jamie Soule has a hell of a reputation 'round these parts [specifically lower leagues managers around the UK], but can our own Rocket Rostock get in amongst them? He's determined to show ICT the error of their ways.

Edited December 8, 2022 by phnompenhandy

[phnompenhandy]

We dominated Thurso from the kick-off, our defence being more assured than at any point last season. We created plenty of chances for Rostock, all of which he squandered apart from a penalty. Our inside forwards helped him out with goals though and we strolled to a 4-0 win.

Penybont, up from Bridgend, would be a tougher test, but we assessed them as being about the same level as the top half of our league, so a very useful test. Being the first week of the season, I went with the same Starting XI, knowing that we’d have over a week to recover after this game (replay aside). Shane informed me there was £5000 for the winners – a point maybe better made if he wasn’t scamming me out of a wage.

This match went much like the first – we dominated from the first, Rostock continually fluffed his lines in the first half, but it didn’t matter, with Kelly bagging a brace from inside left. Aided by an opposition red card, we strolled to 2-0 at half time before easing off the gas. Big Benn Rostock didn’t though – he changed his boots at half time and slammed in a second half hat-trick! 5-0. In addition to the red card, the Penybont players appeared to be tired – perhaps due to the long journey – a factor we may need to consider this season. I hope I also made a point to our huge support of 234 – clean sheet, attacking, entertaining football. I’ve gone into this season with a clear philosophy, thorough pre-season preparation with a settled side supplemented by new quality. It does make me reasonably confident that we can have a better season than I’d thought. In both cups, our next opponents will be tier nine English teams – we have no fear. We also have at least two months of relentless twice-weekly football.

[phnompenhandy]

Our league campaign kicked off with a trip down to the borderlands, to Gretna, where I bought my wife’s band of gold. Before that we all felt for Lairg Rovers who’d made the journey from just in from the north coast of Scotland to Bognor Regis only to get hammered 1-4. What a long and dismal journey back!  Gretna FC 2008 retained its dizzy memories of briefly being a Scottish Premier League side with a flirtation in Europe less than two decades ago – a time our senior club captain Chris Innes remembers well - before going bankrupt and rising from the ashes at a far more modest level. A club that has played in both the Scottish and English leagues; a club that was perfectly at home in this new league system.

A brief stop-off for the romantics amongst us

 

I contemplated going with a more conservative approach away to a ‘better’ side, but after our opening two cup games, I felt we shouldn’t change anything, so tactics and personnel remained the same apart from the keeper. It was hard to drop Eadie, but he’s been promised cup games only and Campbell was expecting his chance in the league. He knows the consequences of dropping a clanger. Whilst Bell has made a great start at right back, I’m still not convinced we’ve cracked the left back weakness, and I’m searching for the best role for Smith.

As before, we started strongly and assured at the back. We created plenty of chances but they were all squandered by Rostock living perpetually offside. At half time I asked him to start deeper, but then he wasn't so much deep as plain invisible so I replaced him with McGlynn. We also had to replace our best man on the day, Jason Kelly, who got a stubbed toe, with Luke Coll. Gretna came back stronger in the second half, but I felt we were clearly the better side (you might think otherwise with Campbell getting player of the match on his debut) in an intriguing 0-0 draw.

We felt positive on the trip home – drawing away to a midtable side, playing the better football. If we can just learn to stay onside, we could be contenders.

Edited December 8, 2022 by phnompenhandy

[phnompenhandy]

Our first home league game at this level was against Nantwich Town, ‘The Dabbers’. They’d lost their first match at the weekend. At half time we were thinking, “Down to Earth. With a bump.” We were simply outclassed all over. So this was what our season would like? We’d gone 0-2 down early on; Severin had pulled one back, but we really weren’t in the game. At half time I made numerous changes, the key one of which was taking off Coll, who was out of his depth as Kelly’s stand-in. Problem was, we had no left winger on the bench. So I stuck Rostock out there and brought on McGlynn up top. In a fantastic second half performance, Willie only went and scored a brace as we stole a 3-2 victory. The real winner was football – what a thrilling game!

 

Oh, and the chronic offside problem? I think I've solved it. Looking at the video footage, we could see what was happening, something that we were getting away with in pre-season due to playing much lower level opposition. Our midfielders and defenders were launching the ball from deep for the forward to run onto. The forward is unable to see the distant teammate and the defenders he's in line with at the same time, while timing his run. Also, those long lobs were very low percentages, getting eaten up by defenders at this level. Solution - rescind the instruction to counter-attack. And change those direct passes to quicker, more accurate shorter passes like we were doing so well last year. Such tactics are much more effective with our squad and at this level. Only problem ....

 

Do you think they'll notice? Will this become problematic?

Edited December 8, 2022 by phnompenhandy

[phnompenhandy]

We only had two days to rest and no training before we were off to the rather pretty English town of Matlock, in the Peak District.

We repeated our tactic of the second half against Nantwich since we couldn’t prepare anything else. Kelly was fit enough for the bench – it could be a really hard decision to choose whether he or Rostock keeps that inside left spot. The centre backs ger really fatigued and the one who lasts 90 minutes has to start on the bench two or three days later – this time it would be Barclay – the general pattern s to start two of Barclay, Nelson and Spence.

Our matches are turning out to be really thrilling for spectators. They’re all closely fought; our defenders are working in a coherent unit like they never did last season, and our attacks are pretty potent but come up a better class of defending and usually inspired goalkeeping. The deadlock was broken by a penalty, won and converted by Rostock. Matlock equalised in the second half – a 1-1 draw was an entirely fair result.

Up rapidly, with no time to train or prepare, we had two home ties against fancied opposition from opposite ends of England, Whitby and Bognor Regis. Whitby were Route One merchants so I ensured the back four were prepared for a bombardment; at the other end I started Kelly with Rostock back up top. I do think that Rostock is better deployed on the left, but Kelly is far more effective and consistent than McGlynn, so my preference is to use McGylnn off the bench.

You could see the boys had their tails up as they went into the first game full of confidence and controlled the game comfortably, establishing a 3-0 lead until Bell made a crazily rash challenge which resulted in a penalty and red card on 63 minutes. Inspired by Campbell, who saved the penalty and a string of strikes after that, we held out for a 3-1 victory.

 

August - our dream start

Edited December 10, 2022 by phnompenhandy

[phnompenhandy]

I suppose it was inevitable that at the King George V Park, our supporters would be hollering the dying words of King George V throughout our match with Bognor Regis Town – still rather embarrassing though.

 

I made a wry face when shaking hands with my opposite – ex-Premier League player Robbie Blake, but he grinned and told me he’s heard worse. They’re a class team, favourites for promotion, and it showed. As our defence resolutely kept us in the game, we didn’t have a single shot until near the end of the first half when Rostock took a penalty, had it saved and then scored a minute later.  They equalised in stoppage time. At half time the players insisted their Bognor counterparts were looking distinctly fatigued. Whilst we generally approach a second half mindful of a game three days later, we agreed that if we went out all guns blazing until we scored again, Bognor wouldn’t come back. So we pressed like maniacs. Our instincts proved right enough, but we couldn’t broach a superkeeper who was on course for player of the match until late on when our goalie Sandy Campbell stole it off him when he launched a thunderous drop kick to the feet of McGlynn, who converted to bring us a 2-1 victory. you asked for direct football people, we delivered.

Edited December 10, 2022 by phnompenhandy

[phnompenhandy]

Willie McGlynn spoilt the party a wee bit, wanting to take the credit for the Bognor win and demanding to be a starter. So we left him behind as Ruaridh Leiper is happy to play supersub. It was along drive down to Canvey Island in Essex for our FA (British) Cup second round tie versus Concord Rangers, and Jock the coach driver was late and confused when we arrived. He couldn’t find the car park and dropped us off down a lane where we all hopped over the fence and strolled across the pitch to the changing rooms.

Concord were better than any side in our league and we were really up against it. Concentrated, resolute defending held them at bay until we had our first chances after half an hour, and soon Kelly had fed Rostock to put us ahead. We held on through the second half with a superb rear-guard whole-team effort and came home with a 1-0 win under our belt.

 

Our reward? Home to CRYSTAL PALACE!

Edited December 10, 2022 by phnompenhandy

[phnompenhandy]

With the whole Highland region - and indeed Scotland abuzz at the draw, we couldn’t afford to think about a game at the end of October, with twelve matches in the six weeks leading up to it. Two days later we were off to Troon in the battle of the golf courses, fellow souls who can empathise with being a football club in an environment where it isn’t the primary sport. Mind you, their players aren’t allowed anywhere near the golf course! It’s a nice wee ground – we got the guided tour with the well-worn history of Pele’s Brazil warming up there ahead of the 1966 World Cup. I was impressed actually. Troon FC was a side I’d targeted to beat to avoid relegation before the season started, long before realising we could maybe beat anyone on our day. We’d have to stay focused to ensure this day was another one of our days. We were still appealing Bell’s extended three-match ban but in the meantime, Smith would go right and Burgess fill in on the left again. I took the precaution of having our physio Morgan stick a bit closer to Darragh Neilson as we’d been tipped off that Troon were one a few clubs considering tapping him up. Willie McGlynn came to see me again before we left for Troon. He’s starting to be a real problem. He has a lot of potential but he’s not reliable enough to be a first team regular and if he can’t accept it, I will have to treat him as a proverbial bad apple.

And the match? We proved our selves to be mortal after all. They have an excellent striker who hit a brace in a 1-2 defeat for us, our first of the season.  Burgess is probably not ready for this level – if Bell is out for more games, I’m going to need a wee rethink. Kelly again showed he can be extremely inconsistent.

Next up we hosted Warrington. We lost 2-3 at home in game we played well in but it did seem to suggest we were reverting to the mean. Bell was allowed to play while is case was being considered, but I maybe made an error in starting Fullerton on the left when Smith was available. More seriously, Kelly has completely lost his form and I think needs a rest. Problem with that is normally it would involve a recall for McGlynn which would have been fine if he hadn’t thrown out his toys.

Edited December 11, 2022 by phnompenhandy

[phnompenhandy]

We had a chance to reset against the weakest English team in the division, East Thurrock. My worries were dissipated. I brought McGlynn along to sit on the bench, and it was a sobering experience for him to see Leiper start up top and win us the game with a brace in a 2-1 win. The mad eejit regaled us with renditions of his favourite Gary Glitter hits on the long drive home.

Mad Ruaridh now a mature 17 year old

 

For the following three matches we’d host three English teams from the south coast. Long journeys! First up was Weymouth in the second round of the Regional Cup – a competition for the bottom three tiers of the pyramid and not exactly a priority. Yes, it was a chance to rest some tired legs and minds, and see if Kelly and McGlynn were in a better frame of mind. McGlynn showed a positive attitude at least, but we were battered 1-4, with cup keeper Eadie being particularly culpable.

 

Edited December 11, 2022 by phnompenhandy

[phnompenhandy]

Back in the league, Gosport came up to Fortrose. We knew them to be one of the favourites for promotion and expected a real battle. My chosen Starting XI was fit and prepared. They showed their quality, but our central defenders stood up to their tasks. With McGlynn scoring for his second game in a row, we earned ourselves a gallant 1-1 draw.

It was our turn to hit the south coast. Worthing, a club in a different league to us in all senses but one.

We were a bit overawed, and easily second best, but we somehow plundered a 1-1 draw. What we needed, however, was a win to close out September, and who better to surrender it to us than hapless Thurso. We faced them away in two days. An inhuman road trip of 750 miles without stopping off to see the families – or school – awaited us.

As turned into October, I lost patience waiting for a contract. I went in to ask Shane and he dismissed me with a go at our recent results. I was outraged given how much better they were compared to his expectations and blew a gasket. He actually backed down and agreed to present me with something after we got back from Thurso. He did – a contract for £0 again. I walked out in disgust. This was AFTER the Thurso game – an astonishing performance that makes a mockery of Carling’s disdain for me. Let me explain ….

Edited December 11, 2022 by phnompenhandy

[phnompenhandy]

The 750 mile, 2-day road trip was a blessing. I had a captive audience for long enough to thoroughly explain new ideas I’d been mulling and planning with our analyst. It was a radical philosophy but one which I was convinced was tailored to the strengths of the first-choice players. It was also the complete antithesis of what Shane wanted so it was also helpful that he hadn’t travelled with us.

I’ll reproduce the diagram on my flipchart, then explain how it went.

 

We counted 73 progressive passes and 124 final third passes (the oppo had 15 and 7, plus 2 off-target shots). Players who’d been mediocre such as Culbert and Kelly suddenly blossomed, while others festering in the reserves – Burgess and Geeghan - turn out to be damn good wingbacks in this set up. If Rostock hadn’t fluffed so many chances, we’d have scored double how many we did in our easy 4-0 victory.

The direct passing Shane and the home fans wanted was just gifting the ball to the opposition; this super-short passing style is a revelation. The lack of quickness had led me to set up with an ultra-low D-line and low block - I did not expect to survive with a high D-line and high line of engagement, but it worked, with my 3 central defenders looking nicely composed. Previously with that set-up neither of my 2 central defenders could get through 90 minutes, so I always had 2 of my 3 subs booked in. No longer - the XI use up less energy with the high line despite the pressing. It works. It not only works - it's beautiful to watch.

Edited December 11, 2022 by phnompenhandy

[phnompenhandy]

We went into October with two Essex sides visiting us – Enfield Town and Hornchurch. McGlynn made like he was pleased to be an understudy attacking midfielder and expressed his commitment to the club. He’s be first sub to either Severin or Kelly. We played well in front of our supporters but drew 1-1 with a very tidy Enfield outfit; however, we saw off Hornchurch 3-1 thanks to a Rostock hat trick. I trust they’ve been duly converted. Nelson and Severin picked up knocks, giving McGlynn a chance to start at Ashton-under-Lyne where their United play. That would be a tough game, but Bonnyton and Lairg would follow before we attempt to kill the Palace giant.

Ashton whacked us 2-5 to show us the new tactic wasn’t a silver bullet. We didn’t play badly, although we missed Severin and our problem at left full/wing back is rearing up again, indicating an urgent need for a personnel upgrade – it’s been Burgess or Anderson underwhelming since the change. I’ll give Wright a go next. No, Ashton United were simply a far better football team than we are at the moment. We should have beaten Bonnyton easily but badly let ourselves down with a complacent performance to draw 1-1.

The two-day turnaround for the Lairg Rovers game was too tight, and I rested the entire first team (the Palace game was six days away), which gave us a chance to assess the second-string with the new tactic. It was a furious game and Lairg gave it all they got – one of their even bagged a hat trick, but we prevailed 5-3 with our fringe players giving us plenty to think about.

You can see the difference this tactic makes, and how Rostock benefits

 

Edited December 11, 2022 by phnompenhandy

[phnompenhandy]

We applied to the British and Scottish FAs for permission to swich the Crystal Palace game to the Caledonian Stadium in Inverness but were refused. A sell-out game at KGV Park with its capacity of 500 was not going to bring us the income we’d hoped for. As it was, only 20 supporters from the first tier Super League club made the trip. We put out our best XI and hoped to give it a good go but alas, up against a host of internationals, most of the young lads froze on the occasion although Sandy made a few decent saves, and we were sent for six. The nine grand would come in handy, albeit not a penny for me.

The priority immediately shifted to giving the lads encouragement for the trip to Gala Fairydean Rovers on the Saturday and come away with a morale-restoring win. Benn Rostock was clearly affected by the last match and spurned some easy chances, but we bagged a 1-1 draw, which was acceptable. That brought us to a turning point in the season. It wasn’t quite half way, having played 17 leagues games, but the beginning of November was the point at which matches would only take part on Saturdays (weather permitting, and with no more cup ties), allowing time for training and recuperation. This could help us put a winning run together, I hoped.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

So the great and mighty have been converted to the virtues of passing and are onboard with the tiki-taka - that's good. Don't like the goals being conceded? We're better at the back than in the previous formation that they wanted; the goals being conceded are purely down to the limitations of the players - the ultra-high defensive line is not resulting in getting done by balls over the top as I'd feared since the midfielders are closing down opponents before they can get their heads up. I suspect a bit of recency bias with the Palace six in people's minds. I predict that through November we'll prove to be defensively pretty tight - even though we face some fancied sides this month.

Edited December 12, 2022 by phnompenhandy

[phnompenhandy]

Talk about fickle - this is what I have to deal with:

How am I supposed to please people who have no idea what they damn well want?

 

Margate made the long trip up to Fortrose. The fans were sensible in predicting a draw but I thought we could take 3 points, and went with Ruairidh Geeghan and Lachie Burgess on the flanks in our only two unsettled positions (all the wingbacks are putting insane efforts into their training aware of the matter). Margate real a real tough nut to crack and I felt we were second best in a 2-2 draw.

Next up was a very winnable game down in Ayrshire at Kilwinning Rangers. But we were completely impotent up front and were lucky to come away with a point in a 0-0 draw. Yet another draw. Our two key defenders, Barclay and Nelson both picked up their fifth yellow cards and are out for our next match. A match that we absolutely could not survive without them.

Edited December 12, 2022 by phnompenhandy

[phnompenhandy]

We hosted Gainsborough Trinity, runaway leaders of our league, ahead of three title-contenders in succession – FC United, Buxton Town and Boston United. At the start of the season, we’d have written those four games off and would have appreciated a single lucky point – but now it would be quite devastating to lose them all. But we really hadn’t recovered from the Crystal Palace humiliation and were not in the best frame of mind collectively.

Ahead of Gainsborough, I hastily arranged a midweek friendly against a local amateur outfit just so the boys could remember what a winning feeling was like. Rostock was chuffed with his hat trick and I think it was a positive exercise. And so we faced the league leaders. In this topsy-turvey world, our makeshift defence held firm in a dour game of 3 shots on target all game, and Severin broke the duck to deliver a 1-0 win.

 

And then ....

Was this the nudge Shane needed? I attended the interviews for the clubs a tier above us and talked transfer budget, wages, proper professional stuff. I didn’t want to go, but this Chairman/Director of Football/Technical Director needs to stop taking me for granted.

 

Crumlin United offered me the job with a salary of £500 per week. Flint was negotiating which of my staff I could bring.

* EDIT: two weeks after I turned Crumlin down and signed a contract to stay at Loch Ness, I learned they were going to stiff me and that £500 was intended to be per month and not per week as they'd clearly told me verbally. I never got to learn exactly what Flint Town would have put on the table.

Edited December 12, 2022 by phnompenhandy

[phnompenhandy]

I was doing a lot of travelling – Ireland and back, Wales and back, and then Manchester to play 3^rd placed FC United. I surreptitiously wangled their director to meet Shane in the club bar in the hope they’d talk managers’ salaries as I knew we’d be meeting over that on our return home, and that if it didn’t go well I’d be resigning.

My cause wasn’t helped at Broadhurst Park where we imploded in a wingback disaster. As they were torn apart, before I could react, Smith got himself a red card and it was all downhill from there. The score of 0-2 didn’t tell the story – it could have been a second Palace. As it turned out, with Shane firmly expecting the outcome, it didn’t really affect contractual negotiations.

 

Contractual negotiations?

 

[phnompenhandy]

Ha ha, result! Backed him into a corner, made him see some sense. I've accepted an income half that what I could have got, but I'll take it until the end of next season. I've got time on my side.

 

[phnompenhandy]

No pleasing this lot though. There's not enough of them to really care - they're mostly schoolkids who'll graduate and leave the town. I have visions of relocating back to Inverness or actually on Loch Ness in my time here.

 

Edited December 12, 2022 by phnompenhandy

[phnompenhandy]

Okay, not bad. Some tasty prospects here. I need to sit down for an extended chat with Muir about what positions and roles we'll be needing going forward though.

 

[phnompenhandy]

A jockeying of positions brought Scott Wright, Lachie Stables and Adam Szemeredi up from the reserves, with Lachie Burgess, Darragh Neilson, Brian Severin and Willie McGlynn getting rotated out after extended spells of mediocrity. I told them I’d be looking at performances in these next two challenging fixtures rather than results.

Buxton came to town. Outplayed, the defence held up and Rostock found his form by jumping on two defensive errors to bag a brace – 2-1! That gave us a bit of confidence to face title favourites Boston United in Lincolnshire. All our preparation came to naught when over-eager Stables got himself sent off early on, and Rostock was in one of his all-too-frequent funks which was a heck of a contrast to the experienced striker Jamie Soule on the other side who destroyed us. That 0-3 result and performance was one to quickly forget.

 

It did however bring us a milestone as we hit midwinter. It's the halfway point of a season where we were expected to struggle against relegation. Here we are:

 

[phnompenhandy]

In the lead up to Christmas we had away days to Bonnyton and Nantwich, lying in 20^th and 21^st place respectively. There are away games we ought to be winning and restoring our mojo. Against Thistle, Scott Wright, who’d been our regular (if poor) left back last season got his chance. Leiper also came in for Rostock. Something clicked – apart from Leiper, we played like a well-oiled machine in the first game, with a Jason Kelly brace helping to a comfortable 4-1 score line.

Ewan Bell picked up a heel injury that would keep him out for 2 or 3 games, And Anderson got a knock too just when Smith and Stables had their suspensions increased, leaving us a bit thin. The lack of quality did cost us when we lost 1-2 to a last minute winner at Nantwich. Awkwardly, the TV cameras were at that match. We could some cash, but didn't present a good account of ourselves across Scotland.

We arrived an hour early at Nantwich in Cheshire, so we took a stroll through the charming centre

 

I must have failed to notice Benny Rostock had overindulged in the Christmas turkey. We ended 2023 on a disappointing note, losing 0-1 home to Gretna. No one played well, but Rostock was plain awful. He'll spend time on the naughty step, but I fear Leiper's off this game too.

Never done this before

 

Edited December 12, 2022 by phnompenhandy