Semi Final 2: Netherlands vs England live from the BVB Stadion Dortmund. Wednesday ITV1 8pm

[Coulthard's Jaw]

 vs 

Possible line-ups

Netherlands: Verbruggen; Dumfries, De Vrij, Van Dijk, Aké; Schouten, Simons, Reijnders; Malen, Depay, Gakpo

England: Pickford; Walker, Stones, Guéhi; Saka, Mainoo, Rice, Shaw; Bellingham, Foden; Kane

The Opta supercomputer ranks the chances extra-time very high in this game at 30.8%.

Route to the semi-finals

Netherlands

Group D
2-1 vs Poland (Gakpo 29, Weghorst 83; Buksa 16)
0-0 vs France
2-3 vs Austria (Gakpo 47, Depay 75; Malen og 6, Schmid 59, Sabitzer 80)

Round of 16
3-0 vs Romania (Gakpo 20, Malen 83 90+3)

Quarter-finals
2-1 vs Türkiye (De Vrij 70, Mert Müldür og 76; Samet Akaydin 35)

England

Group C
1-0 vs Serbia (Bellingham 13)
1-1 vs Denmark (Kane 18; Hjulmand 34)
0-0 vs Slovenia

Round of 16
2-1 aet vs Slovakia (Bellingham 90+5, Kane 91; Schranz 25)

Quarter-finals
1-1 aet 5-3p vs Switzerland (Saka 80; Embolo 75)

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So here we are, for the third time we get an England semi final thanks to Gareth. I'm sure you don't need to be reminded how the last two went, but here, have the videos anyway

And what opponents for England to have! If you are of a certain generation, England vs Netherlands is one of the rivalries that defined a generation of England players.

Sheareerrrrrr and it's 3-0!

Feels apt for this classic montage to be the one the BBC did the last time we won a penalty shootout

COME ON ENGLAND

Edited July 8 by Coulthard's Jaw

[GunmaN1905]

Netherlands, you have one job, the entite world is behind you.

[skybluedave]

4-0 England. Sir Gareth's masterplan is to now release the handbrake

[Astafjevs]

 

[Bliss Seeker]

England have carried this Euros so will be nice for them to make it into the final.

Since the opening matchdays, everything has been about England, Europe might not like us, and we get it, no one likes the big boys, but they sure to hell love talking about us.

Without England interest in this tournament would have waned ages ago. Lets face it, it hasnt exactly been a great tournament, not since the opening week anyway.

Aside from that 1st game week, and the sideshow that was the rise of the minnows, the only thing interesting about the Euros has been England and how Southgate is reinventing what it means to win international football matches.

For the sake of the tournament England need to get through, because let's face it, who wants to watch the yawnfest that would be Netherlands vs Spain? 

[arenaross]

England to continue to ********* their way to the final. 0-0. Penalties. Harry Kane at DM. We know how this is going to go. 

[Wavelberry]

All we can do is endure the ride.

[RTHerringbone]

I predict Depay will run riot, because I think he's totally useless.

On paper the Dutch defence is OK, the midfield is so-so and they have Gakpo. I think we're marginally better but it's a toss-up.

[eenie]

47 minutes ago, RTHerringbone said:

I predict Depay will run riot, because I think he's totally useless.

On paper the Dutch defence is OK, the midfield is so-so and they have Gakpo. I think we're marginally better but it's a toss-up.

I think England are miles better on paper, but still fully expect them to stink their way to the final by a bawhair.

[Rob1981]

Gareth Southgate.  The whole of England is not with you, as it turns out.

[Barry Cartman]

Its finally time for revenge 

 

[Barry Cartman]

11 hours ago, Coulthard's Jaw said:

 

 

'it was a problem caused by Gareth Southgate'

[The_jagster]

England to play for pens because we have lots of competent takers now, only to lose on pens

[Bootador]

I think the praise for Mainoo, who's been fine fwiw, is more damning of England in general than anything else.

[Coulthard's Jaw]

4 hours ago, InigoPatinkin said:

Going to push back a bit on that slightly. England haven't been controlling possession and while Mainoo has helped he certainly hasn't solved the problem of being able to bring the ball out from back to front. He's a good little linkup player in tight spaces but Tchouaméni (12.6), Kroos (12.9), Rodri (8.14), Jorginho (7.50) etc. all average way more progressive passes per 90 than Mainoo (4.35). They're also much higher volume passers. 

I don't know if the solution is to have Shaw invert and provide that option for the team, but way too much pressure is on Rice to be the one who makes the line breaking passes right now. 

 

 

[Bootador]

Playing the wrong young midfielder, but it is what it is now.

[mrmeee17]

It is something the eye test also confirms; he frequently passes it backwards, sideways or immediately back where it came from and often very quickly when sometimes he does actually have the time to properly assess his options and play it forward.

I did wonder if the problem was progressive passing why Wharton wasn't the midfielder picked to partner Rice.

[av3ry]

Euro 96. We drew to Switzerland, then beat Netherlands, then beat Spain (on penalties). If history repeats itself we'll win it and half of Europe will be crying their eyes out

[Rob1981]

It is going to be so good if we come out and play at 100mph because we have been conserving energy until the last two games.

[Bootador]

So many jokes, so many sneers
But all those oh-so-nears
Wear you down
Through the years
But I still see Jude clutching his balls
Anthony Gordon taking the falls
Luke Shaw lynching the seer
And Bukayo limping

[Chorus]
Three Lions on the shirt
Henri Delaunay still gleaming
Fifty Eight years of hurt
Never stopped me dreaming
Gareth Southgate is a cockwomble

Edited July 9 by Bootador

[GunmaN1905]

6 minutes ago, Bootador said:

Luke Shaw lynching the seer

What? Are my English skills bad or?

[Bootador]

1 minute ago, GunmaN1905 said:

What? Are my English skills bad or?

Werewolf reference 

Edited July 9 by Bootador

[VamPook]

4 hours ago, Rob1981 said:

It is going to be so good if we come out and play at 100mph because we have been conserving energy until the last two games.

You do know what always happens once you go 1-0 up right

[ceefax the cat]

Boy did that not scan

Put some effort in ffs

[himan]

 

[Divinity]

14 hours ago, InigoPatinkin said:

I don't know if the solution is to have Shaw invert and provide that option for the team, but way too much pressure is on Rice to be the one who makes the line breaking passes right now. 

If only England had a fullback option who has been inverting all season and playing penetrating passes, who also plays against the Dutch left sided forward on a daily basis. 

[georginho_juventusygr]

COME ON, ENGLAND!

[TalkSport]

Trippier starting again?

[RTHerringbone]

First thing I heard this morning was the John Barnes rap. That has to be some sort of a sign.

[Rob1981]

“That blonde man”  

Graham is so flustered here he can’t even remember Koeman’s name.

[Wavelberry]

19 minutes ago, RTHerringbone said:

First thing I heard this morning was the John Barnes rap. That has to be some sort of a sign.

I have played World in Motion before the Serbia, Slovakia and Switzerland game but not before Denmark or Slovenia... make u think

[Bigwig]

Netherlands have been exciting when attacking but also seem to be relying on some last ditch defending to save a goal at the other end. Could be pretty exciting (probably not). 

[RTHerringbone]

36 minutes ago, Wavelberry said:

I have played World in Motion before the Serbia, Slovakia and Switzerland game but not before Denmark or Slovenia... make u think

Note also that both 'Switzerland' and 'Netherlands' contain the word LAND.

It cannot be a coincidence.

[Redshift]

Let’s do this. 

[oche balboa]

Can't see Netherlands troubling us tonight but we will still play rubbish and win 1-0 

 

[Coulthard's Jaw]

 

[RTHerringbone]

The greatest footballing performance of all time 

[eenie]

Southgate reckons that the scoreline flattered England*, so no chance he goes with that lineup.

 

* He actually said that yesterday.

[Redshift]

Kind of feels weird that there are only 2 games left in this tournament and we could be playing in both of them. We must respect the Netherlands though as they are in a different class to what we have played before. 

[Coulthard's Jaw]

11 minutes ago, eenie said:

Southgate reckons that the scoreline flattered England*, so no chance he goes with that lineup.

 

* He actually said that yesterday.

Yeah I saw that, think the concept of scoring multiple goals in a game is so alien to him he doesn't recognise it as Proper Football.

[Bliss Seeker]

12 minutes ago, eenie said:

Southgate reckons that the scoreline flattered England*, so no chance he goes with that lineup.

 

* He actually said that yesterday.

He's right it did flatter us, iirc we had 13 shots to their 20 odd, and a lower xg.

We just had a perfect storm of chance conversions.

[Bliss Seeker]

Expecting Southgate to revert back to the 4-2-3-1 today, with the only changes being Guehi and Shaw in for Konsa and Trippier.

Dutch seem to play with very wide forwards so would be surprised if it's 3 at the back again.

Yes, that means poor Foden on the left again. But guess we'll be hoping Shaw magically makes all the difference 

[arenaross]

 

 

[Bootador]

Shaw isn't starting from what I've read

[eenie]

12 minutes ago, Bliss Seeker said:

He's right it did flatter us, iirc we had 13 shots to their 20 odd, and a lower xg.

We just had a perfect storm of chance conversions.

Er, hate to break it to you but xG didn't exist back then, everything was still assessed based purely on vibes

[Rob1981]

5 minutes ago, eenie said:

Er, hate to break it to you but xG didn't exist back then, everything was still assessed based purely on vibes

True.  But luckily some intern has been tasked with re-watching all the Euro 96 games and retrospectively applying it:

https://www.sportinglife.com/football/news/how-england-nearly-brought-football-home/192102

Expected Goals (xG): ENG 1.32 - 1.85 SWI
Expected Goals (xG): ENG 1.55 - 0.98 SCO
Expected Goals (xG): ENG 2.58 - 2.96 NED
Expected Goals (xG): ENG 1.63 - 0.76 ESP AET
Expected Goals (xG): ENG 2.12 - 1.23 GER AET

If only some of this mattered.

[Anthrax Dave]

Not confident.

[eenie]

1 minute ago, Rob1981 said:

True.  But luckily some intern has been tasked with re-watching all the Euro 96 games and retrospectively applying it:

https://www.sportinglife.com/football/news/how-england-nearly-brought-football-home/192102

Expected Goals (xG): ENG 1.32 - 1.85 SWI
Expected Goals (xG): ENG 1.55 - 0.98 SCO
Expected Goals (xG): ENG 2.58 - 2.96 NED
Expected Goals (xG): ENG 1.63 - 0.76 ESP AET
Expected Goals (xG): ENG 2.12 - 1.23 GER AET

If only some of this mattered.

No, no, no, you can't just do this. Pre-stats football was purely vibe-based!

But while we're here, did the intern happen to get the stats for xPower and xBigChances too?

[Coulthard's Jaw]

 

[Coulthard's Jaw]

13 minutes ago, Rob1981 said:

True.  But luckily some intern has been tasked with re-watching all the Euro 96 games and retrospectively applying it:

https://www.sportinglife.com/football/news/how-england-nearly-brought-football-home/192102

Expected Goals (xG): ENG 1.32 - 1.85 SWI
Expected Goals (xG): ENG 1.55 - 0.98 SCO
Expected Goals (xG): ENG 2.58 - 2.96 NED
Expected Goals (xG): ENG 1.63 - 0.76 ESP AET
Expected Goals (xG): ENG 2.12 - 1.23 GER AET

If only some of this mattered.

My memory is we battered Netherlands and then got battered by Spain